There's a strong chance that those of you reading along haven't actually had the pleasure of picking up any of the Fifty Shades of Grey novels. We use the word "pleasure" loosely, as it's possibly one of the worst texts ever written. It serves the very limited purpose of getting middle-aged housewives off, but otherwise, it's nothing to write home about (and we suggest you don't). Let us be perfectly clear, erotica is 100% a respectable genre of literature, but Fifty Shades? Wam, bam, no thank you m'am.
Naturally, the movies aren't any better. While both Dakota Johnson (Anastasia Steele) and Jamie Dornan (Christian Grey) are fantastic actors, their chemistry on screen is less than palpable. We think these movies most definitely had the potential to be worthwhile, but given the limitations involved with ratings and censorship, it just fell short. That being said, the trailer is still pretty darn raunchy, take a look...
See what we're saying? Entertaining enough, but eh, we're a little over the whole Fifty Shades thang. Also, could it be any kitschier that they always come out on Valentine's Day?! Word to the wise, if you're planning on trying out BDSM sex for the first time, maybe don't base it on this movie. Actually, definitely don't base it on this movie. You're better off doing some serious internet deep-diving when it comes to that stuff. Otherwise, there's a solid chance you're going to end up in the hospital (all because you thought a "safe word" was merely a suggestion).
Lead Image Via YouTube/FiftyShades