Friends With Benefits Or Boyfriend? A Definitive Guide To The Differences Between The Two

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While we've all enjoyed being someone's f*ck buddy in our lives, deep down—maybe further down than any of us even realize—there's a hopeless romantic who just wants to meet the woman of his dreams.

Whether the relationship with your partner is brand new, or you've been official for as long as a year, sometimes, things change, feeling a little less committed and more like, well, just friends.

I have a few friends in the situation as we speak, which led me to weigh the differences between being someone's f*ck buddy who just gives them enough emotional and physical attachment, and someone's boyfriend, with both sides sacrificing for the good of the relationship.

You're A F*ck Buddy If...

  • The thought of actually going on a date is too much to handle.
  • She gives you less attention than other people, both guys and girls.
  • You can't be open with her and tell her how you feel.
  • She gets squirmish when you try to kiss her in public, especially around people she knows.
  • She only seems to give you attention while drinking.
  • Sex is often first initiated by her, before you both go to bed.
  • Arguments go to the extreme, without resolution, with make-up sex meant to put a band-aid over the disagreements.
  • She's still flirting with other people either in front of you or behind your back.
  • She appears happier while with friends than with you.
  • You seem like a burden on her more than a priority.
  • You only seem to drink together and nothing else.
  • She wouldn't care if you actually left after having sex.

You're A Boyfriend If...

  • She says she loves you.
  • The first thing she does is hug and/or kiss you after a day of work.
  • She surprises you and gives you attention—even when it's not one of your birthdays or a holiday.
  • She supports your career decisions.
  • She defends you to her family and friends—even if, deep down, she's upset with you.
  • She opens up and speaks her mind for the good of the relationship.
  • The two of you cuddle after sex.
  • You experience new things together, accepting both successes and failures.
  • The two of you support one another, no matter what happens.
  • You do sweet things for each other because it makes the other person happy, not just for a sexual "thank you."
  • There's little to no jealousy, with both sides trusting each other.
  • You talk about your future together—even if it's as simple as a weekend trip in a month.

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