12 Tips To Pull Off The Perfect Summer Hookup

Image Via Shutterstock

If I want to play off some common/youthful slang, I could say that summertime is the opposite of "cuffing season."

If you're older than 25, let me explain. Cuffing season refers to the time following summer when people are likely to settle down into a relationship.

I'll share the top definition on Urban Dictionary because, if I'm being honest, it's funnier than anything I could come up with—"During the Fall and Winter months people who would normally rather be single or promiscuous find themselves along with the rest of the world desiring to be "Cuffed" or tied down by a serious relationship. The cold weather and prolonged indoor activity causes singles to become lonely and desperate to be cuffed."

This is exactly why my headline doesn't read, "The Perfect Summer Relationship." There's no such thing! I mean, if you're already dating someone, yeah, fine, whatever, you're all good. But I highly do not recommend STARTING something new in the summer. The summer is about being casual, or hooking up if you will.

Are people still saying, "hooking up?" I just dated myself pretty hard, didn't I? Well, when I was hip and cool, we used the term hooking up and I'm sticking to it! Groovy? Groovy!

These 15 tips will ensure that things remain fun, light, and drama-free:

  1. Establish boundaries EARLY ON—I mean like, 10-seconds after the initial tonguing! The long you wait, the more room for unrealistic expectations to grow.

  2. Have your own friend circle—the perfect summer hookup is NOT someone in your group of friends or even worse, staying in your summer share. Find someone who has their own life outside of your bedroom.

  3. It can't just be a booty call—yes, I realize it's a 'hookup', but you don't need to make anyone feel like a hooker, you know? It's okay to party with the person prior to the physical stuff. Have some humanity!

  4. Sexual Communication is key—this INCLUDES if you're boning other people. You need to be honest about how many partners you currently have. If nothing else, this is about hygiene and health.

  5. Sexual Communication Part Deux—A hookup is primarily a carnal affair. That being said, why are you going to involve yourself if the sex is lackluster? A casual, carefree summer hookup SHOULD be the best sex of your life (well, at least top 5).

  6. NO FAMILY—fairly self-explanatory, but don't go their parent's Fourth of July BBQ. You aren't in love, you aren't even friends, you''re having sex for ONE season (just like Sam and Ron should have).

  7. Speaking on Sam and Ron—don't fall in love at The Jersey Shore or wherever you spend your summers.

  8. No Friend Zone—you're not allowed to hook up with their friends. It's a dick-move and even if you aren't exclusive you should still handle things with tact. Remember, the perfect summer hookup is DRAMA free.

  9. Only follow on like—you can follow each other on social media and like each other's posts on social media but do not post pictures of each other. It sends the wrong message. I know it's ridiculous that I even need to touch upon this, but it's 2017....deal with it.

  10. Don't discuss the future—remember: ONE SEASON LONG.

  11. Keep it safe—have all the sex you want, just don't get a disease and don't knock anyone up.

  12. End things amicably—you never know what the future holds. Don't pull a Danny Zuko and be a complete jerk, because you may very well end up seeing her in the fall!

MORE:'Relationship Red Flags: How You Know Your Girlfriend Is NOT 'The One'