A Man's Guide To Properly Tapping A Keg (Because It's A VERY Important Life Skill)

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Unless there's some cruel and unusual tolerance involved, EVERYONE loves beer. Seriously, I honest to God can't think of a single person who genuinely doesn't like beer. I know a few people who didn't like it when they were younger, but have grown to appreciate the taste as the years have gone by, as any sane person should.

Sure, it's fattening and it makes you bloat and burp, but whatever. Beer is meant to be simple, no bells, no whistles, no chaser, no little umbrellas. It's a drink for the people, by the people! No idea what I mean by that, but I'm going to run with it.

I prefer my beer on tap, not out of a bottle or a can. I did that sh-t all throughout high school (or uh, you know, when I first turned 21) and now that I'm grown, I want some class in my life! I apologize to anyone sipping a Natural Ice tall boy right now, but really, you NEED to grow up.

Anyway, despite the fact that I prefer my beer on tap, doesn't mean I always have to go to a bar or brewery. There's these beautiful, silver, glistening things called kegs that given the proper sized house party you can come in contact with every now and then. Here's the thing though, it's not that easy to tap a keg, or rather, everyone THINKS they know what they're doing but that's rarely the case. Exhibit A:


Unless you want to end up like those dudes, follow these helpful hints from some Home Brewing Experts:

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