Starbursts And Skittles Are Coming Out With Spicy Flavors And Nothing Makes Sense Anymore

Image Via People

I don't even know what to say at this point. Why can't people (cough, cough, corporate America) just leave a GOOD THING ALONE?! Nobody asked for this, Wrigley, and frankly it's just unnatural. Shame on you for releasing a very appreciated all pink pack of Starbursts only to follow it up with this monstrosity. Have you no soul?? Oh yeah, I already knew that when you f'in discontinued LIME SKITTLES AND REPLACED THEM WITH GREEN APPLE VOMIT.

Lime was basically everybody's favorite flavored skittle, then you just go ahead and replace it with the Trump of all flavors and act like you don't owe anyone apologies? I'm sorry, that's just bad business strategy. I wanted a Skittles Apology Tour.

I'm sorry for how aggressively I'm handling this announcement. I don't think I realized how much pent up anger I have against this particular candy manufacturer. Also, to be fair, I'm still trying to cope with Pepsi's announcement of Cinnamon flavored soda.

According to People Magazine a representative from Wrigley confirmed that these fiery disgraces will be hitting the shelves in December. Also, yeah, let's talk about that?? Why December? Wouldn't it make more sense to release something like this in Summer? Who runs this company? Anyway here are the flavor options—"The Skittles flavors include Fiery Watermelon, Blazin’ Mango, Flamin’ Orange, Sizzlin’ Strawberry and Lemon Spark, while the Starburst are similarly flavored with Fiery Watermelon, Strawberry Mango, Flamin’ Orange and Pipin’ Pineapple. Both start at $0.99 per single pack and go up to $3.19 for a laydown bag."

Very clever with the names! Really guys, KU-DOS. May I ask though why every single one makes some allusion to fire/heat/spice and then there's just Strawberry Mango? Seems a bit random, no?

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